By: Bec Harris
Bullying is an ongoing issue in schools, and when parents feel like the school isn’t doing enough, emotions can run high. A recent case in South Australia highlighted this when a mother stormed into her child’s classroom to confront the students bullying her daughter.
While her frustration was understandable, this reaction escalated the situation rather than resolving it. To better understand how parents can effectively address school bullying, we spoke with Conflict Strategist and Mediator Sarah Blake. Here’s what she had to say about handling these difficult situations.
Understanding the Impact of Bullying
Bullying doesn’t just affect the victim—it impacts the entire school community. “Watching the footage and hearing the story, my heart hurt for everyone involved,” Sarah shared. “The mother felt like she had no choice, the child was struggling, and even the other students were exposed to an emotionally charged situation.” The emotional toll can be severe, especially when bullying leads to thoughts of self-harm. This desperation is often what pushes parents to take extreme action, but Sarah stresses that there are more effective ways to address the issue.
Has Bullying Gotten Worse?
Bullying has always existed, but Sarah notes that it has evolved. “What’s different today is the role of social media. Bullying doesn’t stop at the school gates—it follows kids home, making it an ongoing battle.” This constant exposure can make it feel like there’s no escape, increasing anxiety and stress for victims.
The Best Way for Parents to Address Bullying
Sarah recommends a step-by-step approach when dealing with bullying:
- Empower Your Child: Encourage open conversations about what’s happening. “We need to equip kids with the skills to confront bullies because these challenges don’t disappear in adulthood.”
- Understand School Policies: Learn about the school’s bullying intervention policies and behaviour management strategies.
- Document Everything: Keep a record of incidents, conversations, and responses from the school.
- Speak to the Teacher: If the situation doesn’t improve, escalate it to school leadership.
- Set Clear Expectations: Sarah suggests outlining clear expectations with the school: “What steps will be taken? How will progress be measured? When will we check in?”
- If Necessary, Escalate Further: If the school doesn’t take action, parents can approach the education department, seek external mediation, or, in cases of physical violence, involve the police.
How Schools Can Improve Their Approach
Schools face significant challenges in managing bullying. “Teachers are already overwhelmed, and conflict resolution is a skill that many haven’t been trained in,” Sarah explains. Some schools are adopting restorative practices, in-school mediation, and values-based education from an early age. However, consistency is key. “A school that sets clear expectations and consistently enforces them creates an environment where students know what is and isn’t acceptable.”
The Role of Mediation in Resolving Conflict
When bullying reaches a crisis point, mediation can be useful. “Bringing both parties together right away isn’t realistic,” Sarah cautions. Instead, mediation should involve:
- Separate discussions with each child to understand their perspective.
- If appropriate, a guided conversation between both parties.
- Clear agreements on future behaviour to prevent ongoing conflict.
Some schools offer mediation programs, but Sarah believes more can be done: “I’d love to see schools have mediation specialists who can support families through this process.”
When to Consider Changing Schools
If all efforts fail, parents may need to consider whether their child is in a safe environment. “It’s unfair to move the victim, but it’s also unfair to keep them in a harmful situation,” Sarah says. If bullying persists despite interventions, a school change may be necessary.
Bullying is a tough issue, but it’s important for parents, schools, and students to work together rather than against each other. “The best outcomes come from collaboration, not conflict,” Sarah advises. For parents dealing with bullying, the key is to remain calm, document everything, and work systematically through the right channels to create a safe and supportive environment for their child.
Article supplied with thanks to Sonshine.
Feature image: Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Unsplash